Obviously, someone at CNN didn't think the news of the blonde's unexpected demise was worthy of his network's airtime. Mr. Cafferty apparently is at war with his producers over news judgment, as evidenced in this next clip where he refuses to read a story about actress Lindsay Lohan's DUI.
The great Oscar Peterson, seen here with the late, great Ray Brown on bass.
A quick lesson in Street Economics (and no, I'm not referring to Wall Street).
My commute into work on a snowy Christmas day can generally take one of three forms: via the side streets west of I-225 toward Town Center, via the interstate itself, or via Abilene Street, the frontage road for I-225.
I got on Abilene from Iliff and made my way up toward East Mississippi Avenue with virtually no plowing or street-salting done before 1:30 p.m., by which point the snow was about 5 to 6 inches deep depending on the spot. This stretch of Abilene was virtually untouched by anyone looking to alleviate the wintry pain of unrelenting snow for the average resident of Aurora. The top consumer draws for this stretch of Aurora include Amazing Jake's, a few restaurants and an American Furniture Warehouse.
Now take for example the stretch of Abilene north of Mississippi to East Alameda Avenue — home to Sam's Club, the entryway to Exposition (and Wal-Mart and various other businesses), and Town Center at Aurora. Is anyone surprised that the road looked quite nice in comparison to the earlier stretch? You could actually see pavement the entire way from Mississippi to the turn onto Alameda.
As much as I've bickered and complained about the traffic in and around the mall during the holiday season while trying to get to work, the extra attention to the streets on a day when few people braved the roads (and rightly so) benefited yours truly.
Aurora Mayor Ed Tauer appeared on the Sunday, Dec. 16, "Your Show" on KTVD My20 here in the metro area.
Having assumed it was on Channel 9 (where I first heard about it), I checked into the webcast from Channel 9 KUSA's website. For those of you who missed the webcast of the show, here are some of the highlights:
• Mayor Tauer says there is a degree of momentum on talks with International Speedway Corp. regarding the possibility of a NASCAR track coming to Aurora, yet tempered the talk by saying it won't get done without a fair deal for the city.
• Addressing the name change at the University of Colorado Denver campus in Aurora, Mayor Tauer called the exclusion of the word 'Aurora' from the new name was "a slap in the face" to the people who helped make it happen.
• Asked about Aurora's status opposite Denver, Tauer said the city "is coming out of the shadow" of our neighbor to the west. "We're really becoming our own city, and that's the first step... in time, you'll create your own community." Tauer also touted the recent Parade of Homes, Southlands and the Fitzsimmons redevelopment as part of Aurora's transformation.
• Asked about water rebates and rate changes, Tauer said the city has "plenty of water in what we call normal years" and that what remains to be done is to "drought-harden" the city.
• Questions about city-county consolidation were deflected to the work of the Blue Ribbon panel convened by city leaders to seek out the best form of government for Aurora.
• Tauer, queried about illegal immigration, said that local law enforcement always contacts federal officials when they suspect they've detained an illegal immigrant, but added that the federal authorities have not always followed through on their end.
• Mayor Tauer said there are no immediate plans for a District 4 police station.
• Many of the questions posed to the mayor concerned Aurora's public image. In specific regard to a perception of the city as a violent place, Tauer said crime statistics tell a story of safety: "Get the facts out there and show people we are safe."
While I don't spend nearly as much time watching television as I have at other times in my life, I have taken notice of the current writers' strike.
The union honchos for those who pen what's on the tube are still holding out for more moolah, and I don't fault them. Sure, it means no new "Late Show" or "The Office" offerings in the foreseeable future, but there are far worse things to endure in this world.
But as more and more reality shows eat up more and more of the primetime lineup, I want to make sure I get my two cents in before a deal is struck and the chance to cash in on reality show ideas dries up.
With the first votes of the 2008 presidential primary season just weeks away, there's plenty of fodder for unscripted television — assuming we can get the candidates to drop their talking points and pick up those Tiki torches they use on "Survivor."
If for some reason Mike Huckabee falls from grace as the current conservative darling, he can host the next few seasons of "The Biggest Loser" and take his message of eating right, exercising and attacking Darwin to the NBC viewership once a week.
Democratic presidential hopeful Barack Obama, still trailing Sen. Hillary Clinton in national polls, would likely be the frontrunner as a jet-setting contestant on "The Amazing Race" given his childhood years living in Jakarta, Indonesia.
And Rudy Giuliani could secure a spot on the next incarnation of VH1's "I Love New York," so long as he keeps the Sept. 11 anecdotes to the minimum.
And while David Duchovny is busy with some new program on some pay-cable channel I don't subscribe to, skywatcher and alien aficionado Dennis Kucinich can team up as Agent Scully's new partner in an "X-Files" based reality show.
Senator Hillary Clinton, who already has parodied the finale of HBO's "The Sopranos," will need to wait until the strike's over to start her own scripted variety show with former president and hubby Bill as the star.
And assuming the rest of the candidates can't find something else to pique their interest, we could just stick the rest of the bunch into a sprawling, L.A. mansion for the first-ever "Presidential Big Brother" — well, at least the first since the Bush administration.
Possibly one of the saddest celebrity deaths of the past year:
Boots Randolph, 1927 - 2007
The list goes on and on and on...
I woke up at the crack of 8 a.m. on Black Friday, long after all the bargain hunters had stormed various retailers and shopping outlets, fueled by $5 coffee drinks, for $600 plasma TVs and $50 robotic dinosaurs they would haul away in their $40,000 SUVs.
It's been almost a decade since I've braved the early morning crowds for post-Thanksgiving shopping. I don't care to repeat that experience any time soon.
With that said, I have quite a bit of holiday shopping left to do.
Plus, the wife and I still need to settle the "real versus manufactured" debate over this year's Christmas tree.
Then there's the baking, wrapping, merry-making, etc.
Before it's all over, it might get fairly expensive. To recoup these costs, I'm selling the following holiday gift ideas for the rich and famous:
• For Howard K. Stern, the former love interest and attorney to Anna Nicole Smith: A date with Britney Spears.
• For Ben Bernanke, chairman of the Federal Reserve Board: Props for keeping the credit-crunched, China-syndromed economy from completely collapsing.
• For all the 2008 presidential hopefuls: A John Kerry mixtape to help them avoid electoral missteps.
• For Barry Bonds, embattled MLB slugger: Mountains of steroids and cigarettes he can sell to pay protection in prison.
• For Britney Spears: An assortment of wigs, a three-pack of panties and a stack of Dr. Spock books.
• For the MLB seasonal awards voters: A smack across the lips for not a single major honor given to a member of the Colorado Rockies after an unbelievable season and playoff run.
• For the people of Aurora: A water usage rate that makes sense and doesn't bankrupt customers come June and July.
• For Sen. Larry Craig: Posture lessons.
• For the Bush administration: Lots of boxes and packing tape.
• For Bill Clinton: A break from campaigning for Hillary, more time to spend working with old pal George H.W. Bush.
• For everyone else: A library card and a couple of restful hours next to a fire, sipping on the beverage of choice.
Inspired in large part by one of my wife's favorite blogs, Vegas and Food, I decided to bust out my camera phone while dining at 4G's on Friday night so that I can share the experience with a lot more people than were initially there. We started with fries topped with vegetarian green chile; I had the carne adovado while my wife had cheese enchilladas drenched in the veggie green chile. We finished the meal with sopapilla a la mode.
I was surprised from the get-go from seeing a sign up front touting the vegetarian green chile... I'm not a vegetarian, and neither is my wife... but the extent of her willingness to dine on little animals is limited to chicken, turkey and other nasty birds. Me? I have no problem with dining on Wilbur.
I don't like grocery shopping. I like eating. These two factors often conflict with each other.
But last night, I somehow made the drudgery of acquiring my goods far more enjoyable.
I went shopping at night.
I may just have been the best experience in a grocery store I've ever had.
I'm not what you would call agoraphobic -- I just prefer a well-ordered, well-mannered group of people versus a mass of people awkwardly and randomly bumping into one another while racing around with big metal carts and screaming children. I find that's a good comparison of being at Wal-Mart around midnight versus noon.
By the time I reached the canned goods aisle, I wanted nothing more to sit down right there and meditate... Enjoy the silence. I imagine this is what it's like on the moon, except with a lot more pumpkin pie. My own little Sea of Tranquility, and chick peas are on sale.
It also is heartening to see the people working at the store doing something vital and important, and not being forced to deal with an ever-growing line of normal, everyday Americans turned into a tine-crunched, short-tempered troop of bargain hunters on the verge of madness.
I can't say I find much wrong with Wal-Mart, the idea. The super-chain certainly has its detractors these days, and in some instances their complaints are valid. However, my recent experience there made me nostalgic for more of what I saw: a store and its workers quietly doing their job while consumers politely and patiently strolled the aisles in search of goods.
Find me any grocer that can deliver that between the hours of 12 and 6 p.m. and I'll show you my new favorite place to shop; for now, I may just stick with getting groceries overnight.
I like things that work.
Call me crazy, but as intriguing it may be to take something apart and learn how something works, I have far better uses for my time than spending hours fixing something, or (for the things beyond my capabilities) waiting for them to be fixed.
My townhome has been plagued with any number of problems since I moved in just a few months ago, starting with the lack of air conditioning for about a month in summer. Since then, the issues have included a cracked bathtub, a cracked oven knob, a cracked toilet cover, poor wiring for the phone and cable jacks, a horrifically placed electrical outlet just inches from the kitchen faucet and then some.
But the roof hasn't leaked (yet) and the electricity is on all the time, so I find it hard to complain too much — this blog post notwithstanding.
But it makes me appreciate my car a lot more when I put it all in perspective.
The sporty little Pontiac has been in my possession since the summer of 2000. Aside from a small repair to the wiring, minor scares from the 'Check Engine' light (nothing serious) and the inevitable oil changes and tire replacements one incurs over the course of 76,000-plus miles, the car has held up well so far.
I try not to drive it over long distances anymore (that's what our new gas-guzzling monstrosity is for), but every day it starts up with no problems. While it will be a sad day when that's no longer the case, I love my car and it returns my affection with a headache-free day when it comes to automotive matters.
For someone in their mid-20s who's job involves the day-to-day, current events of the world, I'm intensely concerned with the past. Sue me — I was a history major.
But the one thing I've recently come to enjoy is playing 'Remember When,' in which I have reconnected with a number of my old friends and regale them with tales of Las Vegas, marriage, sometimes both simultaneously.
I've never been one to keep in close contact with the people I know but with whom I don't live under the same roof. Moving to Germany at sixth grade limited contact with relatives and friends to occasional phone calls, letters and even audio tapes. But I don't blame my moving around as an Army brat for that — I am the one who rarely keeps in touch.
Heck, I bet if you ask my folks about the issue, they'll likely respond, "Chris?!? He's alive!!?!?" (Don't worry, Mom and Dad — we'll be home for Thanksgiving).
It's not for lack of a venue. No one has an excuse these days with e-mail, iPhones and whatever else you can purchase to make avoiding contact with other human beings completely impossible.
I'm even on two social networking sites (Facebook, MySpace) in addition to this blog and my phone and e-mail, but I don't think I use those sites of social networking so much as amusing myself by posting Halloween pictures and adding cool songs and photos to my profiles.
Really, the social networking aspect of those social networking sites, for me at least, is for my friends to contact me.
I've reconnected with a number of college friends recently, and I can't imagine any 10-, 20- or 30-year reunion could be as fun. The memories of what I've done recently are still quite fresh in my mind... will I remember being electrocuted in the kitchen of my townhome 10 years from now? Come to think of it, do I remember any of it right now?
I'm showing my age when I say that 2001 to 2004 were "the good ole days" — they're certainly not that bit of the Roarin' Twenties as pictured at the top of this post.
But I'm starting to realize that the years I've spent since graduating from college have been just as good (for the most part) as those spent roaming around campus for almost four years.
A recent exchange with a friend revealed to yours truly some cool moments in my life as of late: Moving to Colorado, vacationing in Vegas and the Caribbean, getting married, having Prince play my bachelor party (kinda, sorta), and discovering I'm the Best Uncle Ever.
All this said, maybe I'm waiting to reconnect with my friends until I have stories worth telling them, making sure they're entertained with the recollections of my time on this plane of existence.
So get off my back! I'll call you back someday, but right now I'm living.
I've recently rekindled a favorite pastime of mine: variations of the board game known as RISK. The latest incarnation of the game I've fallen in love with is ATTACK, an online, multiplayer version available via the social networking site Facebook.com.
In the past, I've been relegated to playing against my family members, constantly trying to prove to my father that securing Australia is NOT the best strategy, or forging informal truces and alliances with and against my siblings, venturing beyond the official set of rules to trade cards for snacks and promises of chores to be done.
Just earlier today, however, I played against a quite diverse cast of characters, including a college student logging in from his laptop during lecture hall and a chap from London who took exception to my tactics. It's live, digital and capable of sufficiently trash-talking and expanding the rules ever so slightly.
And I love it.
My strategy? I've always liked forming an informal truce with the strongest player in North America while securing South America and moving into Africa and Europe from there. It doesn't always work, but it's interesting to see each permutation. It's like watching the World Series of Poker on ESPN each year. I can't count high enough to signify how many different ways I've seen someone playing Texas Hold 'Em start with Ace-King or pocket Jacks and end with some odd collection of community cards.
But there's no reason I should like Risk and similar games. Just like poker, you cannot win on skill alone. It is still very much a gamble, with each roll of the dice this becomes clearer. I suppose it makes winning that much more fun — either through sheer luck or by controlling as many variables possible, winning means world domination, if only at the board-game level.
Be sure to check out this week's Pulse section in the Aurora Sentinel Weekend and Home editions for my review of Michael Korda's Ike: An American Hero.
I highly recommend it for those unfamiliar with Eisenhower or his generation. It's not exactly the CliffsNotes take on the 34th president and five-star general, but it's close.
For history buffs and World War II enthusiasts, it rehashes much of what you already know. The book also skips over much of Eisenhower's time in the White House.
As I suggest in the review, seek out the voluminous works of Stephen Ambrose — Eisenhower's official biographer — for the definitive word on Ike.
And if you're ever in Kansas, be sure to check out the Presidential Library and Museum in Abiene. It's an incredible place, with five buildings spread out over 22 acres, and will give you further insight into Ike.
In the first two decades of my life, I remember dozens of visits to the farm my paternal grandparents owned in Wheatland, Mo. The old farmhouse was relegated to storage space by the time I was old enough to remember anything, while the old folks lived in an adjacent trailer — the space just in front of the ramp for my grandmother's wheelchair was home plate for many a game of baseball, kickball and softball; the well was first base, the big tire-turned-sandbox was third.
While they had a television set and rabbit-ear antenna, this was my conception of the country. The dirt road wound for a few miles before pavement, and the paved road took even further before you got to the closest town.
We never ate anything like Hardee's Country Breakfast Burrito while there.
Here's the stats: 920 calories, 60 grams of fat (just five short of the suggested daily intake) and hours of digestional regret. As you can see, the question we should ask is, "What ISN'T in the Country Breakfast Burrito?" But I'll answer to what is in it: "Two egg omelets filled with bacon, sausage, diced ham, cheddar cheese, hash browns and sausage gravy, all wrapped inside a flour tortilla," according to AP reports.
Now I'm not saying I've never eaten all of those items at the same meal before — I'm sure there's at least one buffet in Vegas where I decided I wanted to gorge until I had enough potential energy to last me through the whole day.
I am committed to seeking out the closest Carl's Jr. tomorrow (Thursday, Oct. 18) and subjecting myself, a la Morgan Spurlock, to the horror that is the Country Breakfast Burrito. I anticipate eating nothing but this, water and a salad throughout the entire day.
Wish me luck. If I die, I bequeath all the fame this blog has brought me to Joe Estevez, who is supremely underrated.
UPDATE: I have been unable to find a Carl's Jr. serving the Country Breakfast Burrito. Keep watching this space for further news.
I'll never be able to show my face at Kauffman Stadium again.
I'm sorry, my long-suffering Royals, but my loyalty for the next two weeks is with the NL-best Colorado Rockies.
All I ask is that the rest of my fellow Denver fans express their incredible joy for the Rockies' berth in the World Series in a constructive, nonviolent fashion.
Let's savor this... all those nail-biters, all those late games on the West Coast, all those days with fingers crossed for the Rockies to stay in contention for the wild card...
We are witnessing history in the making, and few things are more magical that Major League Baseball in October — the Fall Classic. Let's go Rockies!
And forgive me, Royals.
It's a contradiction of the anti-contradictory crowd.
America seems to loathe, with 100 percent of its being, politicians who change their minds over the years on the issues.
Does this ring a bell: "I actually did vote for the $87 billion before I voted against it."
That one sentence lost the 2004 presidential election for John Kerry, more so than the Swift Boat Veterans smear campaign or any other tool of rhetoric lobbed at the Senator from Massachusetts.
People just could not reconcile the fact that John Kerry took seemingly different stances on the same issue over time.
That's right, Mitt Romney, we're getting to you right now.
The former governor of Massachusetts (what is it about the Northeast, anyway?) and most recognizable Mormon in America beyond Warren Jeffs (albeit a fundamentalist cult leader) and Bill Paxton (who plays one on TV), Romney has taken aim at a group running a campaign ad he doesn't particularly care for?
The culprits: The Log Cabin Republicans, a grassroots organization of gay and lesbian rights supporters who also like small government, etc.
Their recent campaign ad, which I caught while stomaching the Fox News Channel this week, takes Romney's statements from the past ("youthful indiscretions," maybe?) before he cozied up to the far-right end of the political spectrum and uses them to paint the picture of Romney as a moderate -- the implication being Romney has flip-flopped on the issues now that he has found a home with the anti-choice, anti-gun control crowd.
See for yourself:
It just makes me wonder if a public that seems so fed-up with President George W. Bush (who has been deemed "dead certain" in his convictions by some) and his refusal to rethink the course of action in Iraq, that Mitt Romney's ability to re-evaluate the issues and take a stand against his former self would seem like a breath of fresh air.
When things go wrong, is the fear of having a "flip-flopper" in the Oval Office so great that we maintain the status quo? The people who are most fond of saying "9/11 changed everything" want no change at all, it seems.
You'd be hard-pressed to find a conservative GOP presidential candidate this year more in tune with the hard-right values permeating the country currently than Mitt Romney; Fred Thompson would rank up there if I could take him seriously.
Romney's in a bad situation as his campaign labels his own words as a personal negative attack against him... I feel they're too timid to be as unabashed as Kerry was about the change of heart.
It's a shame... the Log Cabin Romney sounded a lot better than most of the GOP presidential hopefuls I've listened to thus far.
So, Keith Olbermann, the San Diego Chargers' loss to the Kansas City Chiefs was SO shocking?
Really?
Okay, full disclosure: I am, in fact, a Kansas City Chiefs fan... more than two years living in the Denver metro area hasn't dampened the almost lifelong love I have for the boys in red and gold. Mind you, I have little against the Broncos (except for those two weeks a year where KC must do battle with Denver)... so bear with me.
Mr. Olbermann, while pontificating on "Football Night in America" Sunday evening, he made it sound as if Chargers, they of the same hometown as the Famous Chicken, had a breakdown in the vein of the New York Mets this year or the Roman Empire in the Third Century C.E.
Puh-lease, Mr. Olbermann. How many other 2006 playoff teams have you given such degrading treatment to? Lest I remind the world, Oakland, Kansas City, Green Bay and Detroit all have two wins or more now that Week Four heads to its zenith.
No, I won't make any silly "SportsCenter" jokes. Mr. Olbermann now conducts himself with a bit more seriousness than the irreverent ESPN show usually espoused, nevermind his unrelenting need to bash just about anyone while letting those not-so-well-acquainted with his profession to mistaken him for an honest-to-goodness journalist.
But Keith, give the Chiefs a chance. Two wins in a row, they must be doing something right. I'm just glad no one gave him a pulpit (yet) to lament on the Texas Longhorns' disastrous loss to my alma mater, Kansas State University.
While reading late last week in the waiting area of a local Kaiser Permanente clinic (don't ask), I came across a quote that I've always found to be quite profound and yet very simple:
"The past is a foreign country; they do things differently there."
Crikey!
Two articles from the Associated Press today illustrate the dangers posed to you and your children from wearing those little, rubber foot coverings with the holes in the top... no, they're not shoes, I tell ya, those "cute" and flexible toe traps that rhyme with "rocks."
The first story to catch my eye was of a new development in the world of Crocs, as new models without holes in the top are being developed for use in hospitals. Previously, a hospital worker was admonished for wearing Crocs, those in charge charging that a syringe or other hazardous object could jam directly into the worker's foot thanks to the superfluous holes in the top.
Call me old-fashioned, but I want just one hole in my shoe — the one I use to get my foot inside.
The second story retells the horror of youngsters getting their feet stuck in escalators, thanks in large part to the flexible nature of the rubber used. Some unfortunate kiddos had their toenails ripped off as their mothers attempted to extricate them from the situation.
My wife and in-laws swear by these things, but I can't help but do my best to restrain a loud, resounding "I-told-ya-so" every time I hear someone complain about how their feet and ankles hurt after a day of walking in these monstrosities.
Believe me, there is a time and place for sandals, flip flops and slip-ons. Heck, my favorite walkers are a pair of black suede size-12's with no laces, easy to slip on and off... but they come up to my ankles and get me from place to place with no issues.
I have an almost unstoppable fantasy football team: Peyton Manning, Donovan McNabb and Vince Young at QB. Frank Gore, Adrian Peterson, Willis McGahee, Clinton Portis at RB. Reggie Wayne, Terrell Owens and Randy Moss at WR.
Sure, there's only four teams in our work-based league, but I tend to think I've got a stellar shot at riding my players to the championship trophy.
But thanks to a porous Cleveland defense and the most-improbable shoot-out in NFL regular season history, I will be paying for pizza for the office Tuesday night thanks to a boastful bet made with our sports editor, he of the fantasy team helmed by Carson Palmer — he of the six touchdown passes on Sunday afternoon.
Carson, maybe you can get the Browns' D to chip in a few bucks, as I hold all of you responsible for this wrongdoing. This transgression has almost made me forget how much disdain I have for Bill Belichick and his hoodies.
At least everyone will be eating hot, delicious pizza... Don't think the bankroller of this matter won't be getting a healthy taste.
As a followup to yesterday's bit on the prospects of "Curly Sue" star Fred Thompson, here is his speech to the Lincoln Club of Orange County.
Reports today say millionaire adventurer Steve Fossett has gone missing after going airborne from a private airstrip on Monday morning.
Fossett has set 93 Aviation World Records and 23 sailing world records in his various journeys to accomplish what no other human being has before. Most notably in my mind was Fossett's completion of the first solo non-stop flight around the world in his Global Flyer in 2006, assisted by a crew from my alma mater, Kansas State University.
Anyone who can spend more than 20 hours in any plane has the tip of my hat. Fossett was up in the air for more than 67 hours on Global Flyer.
The always intriguing Fossett has also broken 11 world records for gliders, of which four still stand today. Not bad for a former commodities broker.
Overall, Fossett has set more than 115 records in five different sports. He is also one of the most recognizable members of the modern Explorers Club.
Some people might think you have to be crazy to do the sorts of things Fossett has done. I don't necessarily disagree, but I can't argue with crazy in the name of human achievement, especially when the only people he puts in harm's way are himself and his willing crew.
But I think whatever the outcome of this current event, Fossett can be viewed as a positive figure rather than how some would characterize him: a careless, eccentric millionaire who pushed things to the limit one time too many.
It's no secret that Fossett has done so many of these things for his own reasons � "I've never tired from the satisfaction of getting to the top of a mountain" � but is a person of great personal achievement so bad a character for the impressionable to look to for inspiration?
Godspeed, Steve Fossett, wherever you are.
I'm not the best at keeping out of political discussions.
As much as I like to sit back, listen and absorb everything around me, it's hard not to get involved sometimes.
This was the case last week concerning Fred Thompson.
I seem to run in circles that don't understand how a former lobbyist and TV character actor has a snowball's chance in a bid for the White House.
Sure, you won't see me campaigning for him, but Fred Thompson seems to have the pedigree of a GOP presidential hopeful.
First and foremost, Fred Thompson makes a number of conservatives feel good, in much the same way George W. Bush makes them feel good about having a good-old boy type leading the country. It's also very similar to the way Ronald Reagan made conservatives feel good about America in the throes of the Cold War.
Take this recent write-up from the Mortimer Zuckerman-owned New York Daily News as evidence of the perception Thompson has built about himself:
"Thompson is absolutely pro-life, period, no waffling about it... He is solidly pro-Second Amendment, period, no dithering... He's a gung-ho war on terror man, a no-nonsense border security man."
In a race where Mitt Romney has been the toast of the anti-rights abortion crowd -- might I remind you Romney, until 2004, was at least somewhat pro-rights -- Thompson helps the populace paint the political portrait of America with generous amounts of black, white and nothing else.
Don't forget: Thompson has had his persona on display for TV viewers as varied as the millions who have watched "Matlock" to the devotees of HBO's "Sex and The City."
Let's examine some of Thompson's credentials with specificity:
-- Thompson, only a year ago, was a fill-in for radio wunderalt Paul Harvey. Short of going golfing with broadcast behemoths Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly and Hugh Hewitt, there are few ways to win over Middle America via association than helping deliver The Rest of the Story.
-- After serving as campaign manager for former Senator Howard Baker, Thompson was added as minority counsel for the Watergate hearing, doing his best to seem like he wasn't a lapdog for Richard Nixon. Well, maybe lapdog isn't the right phrase.
Examinations of Thompson's book on the subject, as well as testimonials from those involved, seem to point to Fred being an outright mole for the Nixon White House, letting the president's lawyers know when the committee obtained potentially damning evidence. Believe it or not, there are still people in love with Nixon, and when they hear this about Thompson, I can only imagine this tidbit has an effect similar to Cupid's arrow.
-- In modern times, Thompson has continued his defense of the undeservingly defensible with his push for pardoning I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, former chief of staff to Vice President Dick Cheney.
-- Thompson says immigration reform begins with "securing our nation's borders," as he stated earlier this year in a speech before the Lincoln Club of Orange County.
Thompson's had plenty of practice, playing everyone from himself to (shock) the President of the United States on film and television. After a few years of playing essentially the same character over and over, I imagine Thompson can convey (or fake) the needed gravitas one usually garners through decades of public service (or from having scriptwriters pen every word that comes out of your mouth).
I will not be the first to defend Fred Thompson, but I certainly see how his credentials have a lot of people happy they don't have to settle for the likes of Mitt Romney or Rudy Giuliani, or support a second-tier candidate like Ron Paul or Mike Huckabee.
A part of me, upon initially reacting to the Michael Vick dogfighting scandal, wondered quietly, "So what?"
Society loves an entertainer, and entertainers with a propensity to run afoul of the law are no exception.
Crucifixion had its place in ancient Rome and Persia.
The pillory was the rage across Europe for centuries.
The French with their je ne sais quoi were fond of the guillotine.
All of these methods and devices were not merely for punishing criminals and serving as a visual aid aimed at deterrence, but they all were quite fun to watch for parts of the populace.
Whatever happens to Michael Vick will fall in line with these others, I thought to myself.
There are few things you can do with an animal that are more inhumane that training them to fight one another for sport. One of those things is dispatching the dogs in the ways prosecutors allege Michael Vick & Co. did.
That said, Tim Donaghy could end up spending decades in prison for betting on basketball while serving as an NBA referee. While conspiracy to engage in wire fraud is a serious issue, let's compare these two cases.
The respective careers of Michael Vick and Tim Donaghy are, for all intents and purposes, finished.
Both Vick and Donaghy made their living in sports.
And that's where the similiarities end. Vick plans to plead guilty to charges stemming from tales of almost unimaginable cruelty toward another living being. Donaghy made a few lame calls during NBA games to boost his bank account.
But when it's all over, Donaghy likely will spend more time in prison for his misdeeds.
That said, I venture to guess Vick will suffer far more should this really mean the end of his career in professional sports.
The Vick saga is a grand drama, and deep in the hearts of many, I know they're loving every minute of it.
After years of unwarranted criticism from the "vast, right-wing conspiracy," I must balance out the lashing Bill Clinton has taken with -- what else? -- constructive criticism.
The CIA grudgingly released a report Aug. 21, described as a "19-page executive summary," detailing CIA failures to recognize, assess and counter the threats posed by al-Qaida and Osama bin Laden.
I concede that, as Inspector General John Helgerson said, there was no "single point of failure" that could have prevented the Sept. 11 attacks.
Nevertheless, parts of the report are quite troubling, not the least of which is the lack of a "comprehensive report focusing on bin Laden" between 1994 and 2001. Also missing from the CIA intelligence was a "comprehensive report laying out the threats of 2001."
Former CIA chief George Tenet obviously took great exception to what has come out about his agency's perceived faults.
But Tenet, who stepped down as Director of Central Intelligence in 2004, served at the pleasure of former President Bill Clinton.
Clinton is the one big name not in the story, but I cannot help but think the commander-in-chief and head of state and government had every capability to push the CIA into following up on al-Qaida and bin Laden.
And Slick Willie obviously cannot claim ignorance as his defense. He, more than anyone, has touted his administration's determined work on the matter, to the extent that some have said he was obsessed with bin Laden.
Operation Infinite Reach is proof that Clinton understood the threat. Following the U.S. embassy bombings in Kenya and Tanzania, Clinton ordered cruise missile attacks on Afghan sites believed to be connected to al-Qaida, as well as a pharmaceutical plant in Sudan.
Forgive me for being somewhat tough. What I find here is an inability on Clinton's part to instill the leadership and motivation at the CIA to improve upon the conditions outlined in this report.
I cannot take the former president to task on a broader scale, however; in his much ballyhooed interview with Fox News' Chris Wallace, Clinton readily admits -- when asked if he did enough in regards to Osama bin Laden -- "No, because I didn't get him."
But try, he did indeed. And fail, he did that, too.
But the failure to capture or kill Osama bin Laden is a far different matter than the failure to have his top intelligence agency follow through on these threats that he claims were taken as seriously as possible.
Again, forgive me for thinking Bill Clinton was expertly capable of getting what he wanted from his underlings.
But maybe the worst part about all of this is the fact it's even a point of discussion.
I write this with an eye toward how the historians will treat the likes of Tenet, Clinton, etc. How any of this is vital to the ongoing hunt for bin Laden and al-Qaida escapes me, as well as current CIA Director Michael Hayden, who was forced to release the report by a law signed by President George W. Bush.
Furthermore, I won't hold my breath thinking better intelligence would have helped the Bush administration commission the U.S. military in a way that would have led to the capture or killing of bin Laden and avoided the monstrous disaster known as the war in Iraq. A number of high-ranking Bush administration members (including Dick Cheney, Scooter Libby, Donald Rumsfeld and Paul Wolfowitz), as it has been well-documented, were involved with the Project for the New American Century, a group whose idea of America's "vital role in maintaining peace and security" in the Middle East apparently meant forcing democracy (and U.S.-friendly oil revenue laws) down the throats of a people who for centuries managed their own affairs in a way that worked for them but not for corporate interests in the pocket of neo-conservative politicians and ideologues.
No, the Sept. 11 terror attacks likely were unstoppable. I venture to say anyone who says differently says so to the detriment of a political foe. But I think it's far more hopeful to think the truth of this matter, in agonizing detail, will someday come out.
There tend to be two ways of thinking about history: Either it was your favorite subject in school, or you couldn't stand it and the memorization of names, dates and places.
In either case, I hypothesize that history � regardless of which end of the spectrum it falls on for you � is America's worst subject.
I recently was told a story about a workplace quiz competition centered on U.S. history. The person telling this story wholly admits to not knowing enough about history in general, U.S. history in specific.
And guess who ran away with the competition? Apparently, the other contestants were taken aback by anyone who might have a snowball's chance against the youngsters on the Jeff Foxworthy-hosted "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth-Grader?"
Show me one fifth-grader that, when asked about the cause of the American Civil War, can say anything beyond "slavery" and "states' rights," and I will show you a set of parents and teachers who are getting it right.
But I digress.
As someone who divided his time equally between history classes in college and the campus paper's newsroom, I like to think I've got a decent grasp on where this country has been and what it's seen for a person of my age.
But I must acknowledge that my education in history was flawed long before I first stepped on university ground.
There was the teacher who thought "blitzkrieg" was a German tactic � and an American word. This qualifies as a half-truth.
She might have been more familiar with another usage of the word:
By no coincidence, this was the same teacher who relied heavily on an ABC News-produced video series to make sure we had our historical bases covered without us thinking bad of her for forcing us to (*GASP*) listen to lectures, read books and take copious notes.
But in defense of Mrs. Duck (names have been changed to protect the innocent, just like Jack Webb), she introduced me to the work of John Ford, easily the greatest director in the history of cinema.
If anything should be required viewing to middle- and high-school students, it's "The Grapes of Wrath" and its mournful refrain of "Red River Valley."
But as much as Joey Ramone, John Ford and the rest of the canon of entertainers dabbled with thoughts and phrases regarding the American experience, it only does so much.
"The Grapes of Wrath" is a great movie, but it's not a documentary. It's based on a novel. Actor and comedian Robert Wuhl recently proclaimed his own hypothesis of history being "based on a true story." This may be the case here.
For that matter, Mel Gibson's biggest box-office hit was not, in fact, an honest-to-God presentation of the Greatest Story Ever Told. But that won't stop legions of the faithful from thinking "The Passion" to be pretty close to how it all happened, if it did at all.
But it was a good movie, right?
Thank goodness "Pearl Harbor" was roundly dismissed as a bad movie, lest we be lead to believe good ole Jimmy Doolittle looked or sounded the least bit like Alec Baldwin.
But accepting the history in movies when we shouldn't (or at least buying into its authenticity more than we should) is mostly our own individual faults.
How any student gets out of high school only knowing Julius Caesar from a week of Shakespeare in theater class is quite troubling to me, if only for the fact that this actually happens today in the U.S. public school system.
But don't get me wrong. I have nothing against public schools or the hard-working people who keep them up and running. My mother, a public school teacher for the vast majority of her adult life, is one of those people who endures the administrative headaches and daily crises to make sure that her students are not just being shuffled along, grade to grade, year to year, to make sure enough kids graduate each year that they can stay in a community's good graces despite struggling with the mandates of No Child Left Behind and AYP.
I merely think it's important for everyone to play a strong role in developing a young person's desire to learn, and history is the best place to start. Even if little Billy ends up thinking a young Tom Hanks went up to the Zoltar machine, grew into a man overnight, worked on Death Row during the Great Depression before going off to find Matt Damon in France during the Second World War, there's a decent chance of Billy heading to the library for a copy of Tom H. Watkins' "The Hungry Years" or a biography of Dwight D. Eisenhower.
"When the legend becomes fact, print the legend." � Maxwell Scott in "The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance"
The rise and fall of John McCain Do you remember the 2000 presidential campaign as well as I do? Just shortly after George W. Bush became the sentimental choice within Republican circles to be 'the guy' to restore dignity to the Oval Office, John McCain quietly started his hope-filled (and ultimately disastrous) quest for the White House. Did the wave of McCain popularity truly crest the night of the 2000 New Hampshire GOP primary, in which McCain rocked the vote and wrestled a victory away from Bush? From there, the Bush machine destroyed McCain in the South, most notably the South Carolina primary and the insinuations about a biracial child out of wedlock. And that was it. McCain and his Straight Talk Express took aim at the Religious Right and Bush's decision to visit Bob Jones University � this effectively ended his chances of securing the GOP nomination. But as the dust settled on one of the most contentious presidential elections in American history, John McCain went back to his Senate seat and did little else to burn bridges with the cross-section of America that fell in love with his unique platform and even more unique method of spreading the word: the Straight Talk Express. Then came the war and the 2004 presidential election.
With the unpopular invasion of Iraq putting dents in President Bush�s bloc of support from Conservative America and the first in many waves to turn the tide toward a Democratic-controlled Congress in 2006, McCain got caught in an undertow.
Ever since throwing his support behind President Bush in 2004, John McCain has engaged in a mind-bendingly curious campaign to cozy up to the Far Right in America.
McCain had long been reviled in conservative sects, a pi�ata for the talk radio crowd � and he never had a chance of winning them over.
How has McCain engaged in this futile effort?
1. McCain supported the invasion of Iraq and has said the world is better off without Saddam Hussein. At the same time, he has expressed personal disdain for former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld�s performance yet would not demand his resignation.
2. McCain, as recently as February 2007, stated he believes the Roe v. Wade Supreme Court ruling should be overturned.
3. McCain supports the teaching of intelligent design in public schools.
4. McCain jokingly insinuated to an audience that the U.S. military should bomb Iran.
Conversely, McCain has held strong to some key ideas that keep him firmly at odds with the Pat Robertson crowd:
1. McCain, a former POW, has opposed the Bush administration�s willingness to condone degrading and harmful detainee treatment, bordering on torture.
2. McCain is no fan of the much-ballyhooed Mexican border fence touted by the anti-immigration crowd.
3. McCain supports embryonic stem cell research.
4. McCain was a member of the �Gang of 14,� which sought to bring a bipartisan solution to the contentious debate over President Bush�s judicial nominees and the Republican majority�s ability to use the �nuclear option� to end Democratic filibusters.
As much as McCain�s mixed platform in 2000 won broad support, his move to the right while holding some decidedly liberal-leaning positions since 2004 has fallen flat with many conservatives, legions of independents and most liberals.
And now word is out that Senator McCain�s 2008 presidential campaign has failed to keep up with fundraising compared to Mitt Romney and Rudy Giuliani. McCain has also suffered major shakeups within his brain trust, most recently the resignations of John Weaver and Terry Nelson.
Some pundits have likened this development to President Bush operating without political mastermind Karl Rove.
But who knows? If Weaver and Nelson helped craft McCain into the failed candidate he is in 2007, I must imagine the pugnacious Senator McCain could possibly revive some of the magic he had in 2000 before the primaries of 2008.
But as a betting man, I must put my money not on what Senator McCain would wear to his inauguration in early 2009, but rather when the death knell for his presidential prospects sound off.
Is it possible I�ve already missed the bus on placing that bet? Just as well. That bus was probably the Straight Talk Express, and it could just as easily be rested in rubble somewhere at the bottom of the Grand Canyon.
�Tried faith all worn and thin / for all we could have done / and all that could have been.�
Word comes today of a private buyer grabbing up an Airbus A380 superjumbo jetliner... for his own personal, private use.
An AFP report says the final total for the purchase will be as much as 450 million dollars after the airliner is customized to fit the buyer's specifications.
Just to give you a sense of scale, the Airbus A380 can carry 840 passengers:
So let's say this notable Airbus aficionado brings along 20 friends on a trip, along with three pilots and eight attendants serving drinks and fulfilling what are likely quite indulgent tastes, here's how close they come to filling the passenger capacity:
But I won't criticize this person, as much as my infographics suggest otherwise. For all I know, this wealthy person could be flying orphans to receive needed medical care in faraway lands for free. How noble!
Pecvniate obedivnt omnia. Loosely translated, all things obey money.
I guess she thinks Celine Dion will be as helpful to her as it was James Cameron.
That's right, Hillary Clinton -- junior senator from New York and erstwhile contender for the Democratic presidential nomination -- ended her quest for a campaign song today.
The lucky song's name? "You and I." Advance to the 49-second mark to see one of the candidates for Leader of the Free World bobbing and swaying to what I believe is an excerpt from the song.
All of this was part of the Web 2.0-steeped efforts to motivate her digital base.
Color me unimpressed. First, it doesn't seem as though the process of gathering netizen input and making a decision on the song was organic as the video would suggest. Second, who picks Celine Dion for a campaign song?
But Sen. Clinton is only the latest in a line of lame campaign song choices:
- The 2004 presidential campaign saw incumbent President Bush select country outfit Brooks and Dunn for a pseudo-stirring, patriotic anthem, "Only in America." Sen. John Kerry chose a decent Boss tune ("No Surrender"), but by associating it with his languishing campaign did it a disservice, so I label it a flop.
-- Bush the 43rd co-opted Tom Petty (for shame) and Van Hagar in 2000, along with *shudder* Billy Ray Cyrus. Al Gore, winner of the popular vote, did the hippest thing since inventing the Internet by picking BTO's "You Ain't See Nothing Yet."
-- Kansas native Bob Dole bastardized Sam and Dave's "Soul Man" in his failed attempt to unseat Bill Clinton in 1996.
-- The Gipper used Springsteen's "Born in the U.S.A.," thinking the ode to America's disaffected Vietnam veterans would be perfect for Reagan/Bush 1984. The Boss later asked the campaign to not use the song furthermore. At the same time, one of the worst campaigns known to man -- Mondale in 1984 -- was blaring Neil Diamond's "Coming To America" (I think Tom Tancredo could win my vote based on irony if he picked this as his campaign song).
Whatever happened to "Tippecanoe and Tyler too"?
UPDATE: Sen. Clinton has put herself into the allusionary shoes of fictional sociopath Tony Soprano in a parody of "The Sopranos" finale. I'm starting to think Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" would have made a better campaign song than anything in the discography of Celine Dion. Here's the video:
I'm generally a big fan of anyone who can take the complex or daunting and turn it into something accessible and understandable to those who need to know. Don Herbert was one of those people.
If that name doesn't immediately register in your mind as recognizable, you'll likely to better know Herbert as "Mr. Wizard," the host of the kid-friendly science shows that laid the groundwork for folks like Bill Nye the Science Guy.
Like many in my generation, I discovered "Mr. Wizard" in his later days on cable's Nickelodeon. "Mr. Wizard's World," I'm told, was the longest-running show on Nickelodeon.
One would like to think he had the effect on children and their interest in science that the space program and NASA have had over the years.
Whether or not that's the case, Herbert was a veteran of the Second World War, flying B-24 bombers for the Army Air Corps and taking part in the invasion of Italy. That alone gets him a spot of honor in the history books.
Here's to you, Don Herbert!
I was reminded earlier today of an excerpt from "Macbeth":
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.*
There you have it — the "Sopranos" series finale, summed up by the David Chase of the 17th Century, William Shakespeare.
It was the ultimate anticlimax for pay-TV's ultimate antihero. It was an ending meant to simultaneously please and embitter all viewers.
But instead of pondering what it all means, I can only wonder what the ending of HBO's showcase series will mean for the world.
Assuming the water-cooler talk continues on through the week (thanks in some part to those catching up with the finale on DVR or TiVo), productivity in workplaces worldwide will either see a big boost or — far more likely — turn their collective attentions to The Next Big Thing.
Again, I constantly remind myself that a small percentage of Americans have ever watched HBO beyond the realm of big-ticket boxing, let alone a single episode of any series... and that the diehard "Sopranos" aficionados represent a small enclave of Americana.
And if you've read this far into this post, you must have something to say about how Casa Soprano closed up shop for good. Email me or comment back on how you thought the series should have ended.
At least you can stop wondering if Furio or the Russian are coming back.
UPDATE: The ratings are in... "The Sopranos" series finale, despite being available to only 30 million households nationwide, bested all of the programs on Fox, ABC and CBS for the ratings week.
Of course, the Don of New Jersey has always been obsessed with ducks, but in this case it's the Peacock Network that did better than the HBO series' swan song. The premiere of NBC's "America's Got Talent" came in at No. 1.
Don't you just hate losing on a technicality?
That's exactly what happened to a group of attorneys this week when a military judge threw out the charges against a man held at Guantanamo Bay on suspicion of terror-related activities.
As The Associated Press reported, Omar Khadr, a 20-year-old who was captured five years ago in Afghanistan, is on the receiving end of an edict in the 2006 Military Commissions Act — war trials at Gitmo are only authorized for "unlawful" combatants. Khadr, the AP says, was classified as an enemy combatant without the preceding "unlawful" tag.
Some might see it as the equivalent of having the right answer on "Jeopardy!" but not phrasing it in the form of the question.
"I'll take legal blunders for $400, Alex."
I'm well-acquainted with the intricacy of the English language, and I imagine most people have little to no desire to stand in the position of making sure these minor, bureaucratic matters are properly addressed.
But this isn't a daytime game show. This time we're talking war. This time we're dealing with people's lives and national security.
It's tempting to immediately side with the hard-working attorneys devoted to these cases. One of them — Marine Col. Dwight Sullivan — said of the judge's decision to dismiss charges, "It's the latest demonstration that this newest system just does not work," according to AP.
I chalk this one up to an all-too-rare case of the establishment not having its ducks in a row. But give them some credit: Some of those detainees may have posed some form of threat to America or American interests had they not been captured and held.
Say what you will about how they have been treated individually — that's an entirely different story. If we are going to take this war and the thousands of American lives lost while waging it seriously, the taxpayer-funded legal teams charged with bringing these men to justice need to dot every I, cross every T and be far more attentive to details than this news suggests.
The 10th Annual Aurora Asian Film Festival (try saying that five times fast) is officially under way on a culturally packed weekend in town. Do you have your ticket?
Things kicked off tonight with "Journey From The Fall" and continue through Sunday. Be sure to pick up a copy of our special section on the festivities, or click the link to our online coverage on the lefthand navigation bar of this very site.
You'll find an overview of the events, as well as reviews of many of the movies on the bill. Shameless self promotion: I thoroughly enjoyed the festival's closing film, "Buddha's Lost Children." The quality of the photography, as well as the editing together of a year's worth of footage into a 97-minute feature, work as well or better than most documentaries, regardless of topic.
I'll go ahead and introduce a semi-regular feature to Sliced Bread:
Toast
A Sliced Bread Toast goes to all those amazing students who recently took part in the Scripps National Spelling Bee. California's Evan O'Dorney is your 2007 champion, correctly spelling "serrefine."
The thing is, O'Dorney apparently likes math much more than spelling. Pressed by Stuart Scott on the telecast on whether he likes spelling more now that he's won, the 13-year-old seems to shrug off the fact he just won more than $40,000 in prizes as if it were nothing.
But I'll forgive him for not playing up his emotions for the cameras and the ESPN maven. I doubt I could have rattled off "p-a-p-p-a-r-d-e-l-l-e" (large fettuccine) at age 13.
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